Letters to the world

So, today I think I am just going to post a few letters to the world. Just a few notes to a few "people" that are getting on my nerves. And I will share them with you for your bemusement. Why? 'Cuz I'm awesome like that. Here goes. Feel free to chime in with your own letter to the world or whatever.

Dear Aunt Flo,
Must my bobbies SERIOUSLY hurt this bad? I mean, really? I did nothing painful to you. I look forward to your visit to know that things are right with my body. I deal with the heaviness you bring me. I let Lorelli say, "That's what happens when you're on your period" to me when I am cranky. But seriously...this sore booby business...I am not a happy camper!!
See you soon,
Sore on the TopSide

Dear Email Powers That Be,
Why do I have emails in my inbox regarding how to acquire Viagra from Canada and hip replacement medicine? I don't look at anything with boy parts on it. Is it because I have been looking at the Frederick's website and motorcycle websites? Does that scream middle aged man that needs to keep it up? And the hip replacements? I am guessing that is because I have been talking about physical therapy? It's FOR MY ARM people. SHEESH!
Sincerely,
Perplexed box

Dear Wifey's Ex-GF,
Please do not engage me in conversation when our paths cross randomly in town. We do not need to be friends. I know that we chat it up at softball games, but those are forced social interactions that only occur so that we do not look rude. But really, yesterday morning was not necessary. I didn't even have my makeup on. Or my hair done. I don't like talking to myself like that. Yet less others. Yet less exes of my loverly wife.
Just saying,
Mortified on a Monday Morning

Dear Right Arm,
Enough is enough. I am pretty much over this pain you have dealt me. While the massage at physical therapy is nice, you know what would be better? Not. Needing. Physical. Therapy. That would be awesome. Your pain came from out of the blue and I don't understand it. But you are seriously hampering my positive outlook on life right now.
Thanks,
Pained parts

Dear Five Year Old,
You do not have Mean Moms. You have moms that make you behave and follow the rules and live up to expectations. Mean moms would not take you on vacations to the beach. Mean moms would not paint you an awesome room. Mean moms would not buy you awesome new clothes. Or let you partake in Saturday morning sports at the Y. You do, however, have moms that will not be talked ugly to. You do have moms that will not sit back and let you rule the house.
Love,
Not-So Mean Moms

Dear MIL,
I love all the clothes that you have so graciously given me. SERIOUSLY!! They rock my socks. And I am sooo grateful that you let us live here with you. It allows us to do so many things that we wouldn't be able to do otherwise. I TRULY enjoy our family vacations and spending money. What I do NOT enjoy is constantly having to clean the kitchen. I do not enjoy listening to you coddle the doggers in this house like they are children. And I really don't enjoy you butting in when Jennifer and I are already taking care of a situation with aforementioned five year old.
Ever so graciously yours,
DIL

Dear 24 hour days,
Do you think you could talk to your friends and maybe come up with a couple more hours for me? I just can not possibly get everything done in the limited time that you give me. I can't cook, clean, read, sleep, enjoy, eat, pee, shower, love, cuddle, entertain, work, chat, and relax in the few short hours that you provide me. Granted, if you gave me more hours, I would probably use them for sleeping right now....but still...Look into that for me, please?
Patiently awaiting your response,
Stretched Thin

BBQ at Buttermilk

Lorelli had been talking all weekend about how Monday is about the soldiers. We told her this is true but that it is a day for soldiers that have passed, whether in life, war, combat, or anything and that we pray for them and honor them on Monday. Well, recently, we got an American flag to hang in our front yard. So, every time she passed our front window (the whole weekend) she would bow her little head and put her hands together and say some kind of little prayer for the soldiers. It was pretty much one of the cutest things she has done in a while. One time she told me that her little prayer was, "Dear God, I am sorry that the soldiers had to die. I hope they are happy now and that their moms and kids are not so sad."

Monday Lorelli and I were both off and Jennifer had to work a little bit. But we planned on attending this awesome BBQ out at Buttermilk Falls with a bunch of friends from her old job site. It was HOT HOT HOT on Monday. Like seriously...95 degrees or something. That's pretty darn hot for up here. And there was no cool breeze. If I have your phone number, you probably received a text saying something along the lines of, "Days like today make me rejoice for the feminist movement. No way would we survive in hoop skirts, petticoats, and full body bustiers!" But, I digress. We went to the falls and had a FANTASTIC time hanging out and chatting.

At first, there was only Lorelli in the kid age group. And then two other little kids, and then 3 more, then 1 more....you get the picture. By the end of the picnic there was a group of 25+ people and lots of kiddos. We had brought some Crayola color bubbles and some sidewalk chalk for her to play with in case she was the only kid. She's pretty good at entertaining herself most of the time. She took her sidewalk chalk down to the bottom of the hill and started drawing. A kid from the picnic came down and drew with her. And  then another. And then a random kid from the park. And another. Pretty soon, I think that every child in Ithaca was there coloring on the sidewalk at the park. It was SOO great!

A waterfall to the lake

hard at work

A whole town's effort

And of course....since we were at the falls....there was some water play. There were plenty of signs that said NO SWIMMING!!! But that didn't stop us from sticking our feet in.

Her co-worker's young daughter

3 happy girls

The afternoon turned out to be a huge success and everyone there had a a blast!